Jman & Johnny Love Movie Review; G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

lol, aww guys, you can nearly see the disappointment oozing through the screen! I think you were actually too kind! Anyway, great stuff as always.

Sorry, LEEE... I was right there with you about being really excited about this movie. It was piss-poor... all around...

Dang, sorry it took too awhile,

i got stuck on 3.32 arggghhhh my friggin' computer!

I think its becoz im actually downloading the movie this second lol, heh heh, just jokin' ; D

JMAN @ Lmao!!! Love the mention dude heh heh! Hey my horse is sick at the moment i couldn't ride in!!! ; D

I'll try an reboot my pc to see it all or wait abit if that don't happen, man, ppl don't download porn, its bad 4 your computer, i downloaded the parody GI WHORES yesterday lol! Heh heh, okay i wont say anything about the movie gotta do dat review thingie!

Great vid guys, hey the lil guy said it was better than he expected lol!

Funny i was gonna ask you and JOHNNY when ya was doing ya vid, an you beat me to it!!! ; D

Three thumbs!!! (Yeah i got three lol)

Moon @ Cant say a word dude! But good man! ; )

I am what would be considered a "fan boy" of GIJOE and I thoroughly enjoyed this movie! I grew up on the cartoons, comics and toys but I keep an open mind to things and realize that my way is not the only way of doing something. This movie was fun from start to finish and definitely had me wanting more at the end(unlike any other movie this summer)!

Yes, I would have done things differently if it was up to me but all in all, my lady and I really had fun and can't wait for the sequel.

Who's to say whats bad taste and good taste. I like Wolverine!! Different strokes for different geeks!

I saw it, it could of been better but it could of also been worse so there ya have it lol. Its was ok to see once in theater.

grif@ there was a cobra commander mask, but it sucked.

not a bad review. i felt pretty much the same except i thought the cgi was awful. the cgi fish and polar bear were just horrendous.

blowexican, it's not bad because it's a new origin, it's bad because it was poorly executed. I'm all for reimagining things, they just need to be done well.

well, i had more fun watching it than transformers 2.

haha, shocking isn't it? Although by that stage nothing could have surprised me. I just get angry when i think about how little Sommers and his team of chimps with type writers think of their target audience. Can you imagine the conversation..

"Stephen, you know, ice floats..and im pretty sure 99% of everyone in the world over 5 knows that..

"Yes! But dont worry because its a "popcorn" movie!..They have "left their brains at home"! Im free to insult their intelligence all i want! Stick a rubbish looking cartoon polar bear in there while your at it, and have it hump Scarletts leg..(oh sorry, wrong movie!)"

J BOYS,TOO NORMAL DUDES WITH HONEST OPINIONS, I CALL A POL FOR THIS SUMMER..WHICH MOVIE WAS TOPS AND WICH WAS NOTS-STAR TREK-WOLVERINE-GI JOE-YOU GUYS CALL IT...MY VOTE FOR TOPS-.........STAR TREK.

Very Scary. You got to accept that the special effects back then wernt that good. But the story and the actors/acting (for the most part)was solid. Thats what made the movie. How has hollywood forgoten that?

Best movie I've seen this summer that's easy....STAR TREK and Im not a fan of the t.v. series. The worst: Wolverine and thats only ,because I havent seen G.I.Joe on dvd yet. About G.I.JOE I have a reboot idea I mention on another thread I cant seem to find. My idea was to have a few of our own to reboot G.I.Joe from cast-directing...here's my list.

LEEE777: CASTING why?Because he had such high hopes for the movie and then they cast that CLOWN Wayans as RIPCORD I knew then the movie was going to be crap. Im sure LEEE would've thought twice about that choice and not made it...right LEEE?
Rors01 : Asst director I like his ideas usually and every good director needs a capable asst.
SHAMAN :Director\CGI I think he has really great ideas and it seems he would know just how we'd want to see our action displayed on the big screen...and he submits such nice drawings...LOL.
HAWK : Writer I've read some of his stuff pretty good. I think HE and SHAMAN would work real well together and bring us the JOE we all want to see...and I know there's nothing in their story that'll justify using a CLOWN.
O.K. folks I think I've found the solution into fixing this MAJOR disappiontment of the summer as stated by the masses here on CBM.com. As long as LEEE doesnt cast that CLOWN Wayans OR anyother comedian black,white,red,or yellow NO FUNNY GUYS!!!

OK I saw this film and I am torn. So for the things I liked first.

1. Zartan- I love Arnold Vosloo as this character even though he wasn't in it much I think he portrayed him nicely. I also like how he gets his ability to change his appearance.

2. Snake Eyes & Storm Shadow- fight scenes.

3. Destro- Christopher Eccleston did a bang up job

4. The Vipers & The Elite Vipers

5. The Doctor- Yes I did like Joseph Gordon-Levitt as the Doctor. If they make another I think he will do a good job as C.C.

6. The Technology- The night Raven and the S.H.A.R.C.s were cool
basically I liked the vehicles and I thought the under
water M.A.R.S. base was neat

Now for what I disliked
1. Duke- Channing Tatum is nothing like Duke will never
be anything like him. I actually don't understand why
this guy has an acting career. I have never liked a
single film I have seen with him in it. His
performance seems forced and he just seems to be
unintelligent.

2. Ripcord- Marlon Wayans needs to stick to what he is
good at, the Scary Movie franchise. Another thing
that has always really bothered me, why Ripcord. Why
not just make him Stalker. He is one of the originals
and a would fit in better with the story.

3. Some of Breakers Tech- I'm not going to say what but for those who have seen the movie I think you know which one I am talking about.

4. Dr. Mindbender. OK this is minor but would it have been so hard to shave Kevin J. O'Connor's head and give him a monocle and mustache?

Now for some things that really ticked me off


What I hated the most with the plot is the convenience of everyone already knowing each other. Duke in love with Ana. Rex being his buddy. Ana being Rex's sister. The Baroness and CC are Brother and Sister?! I say B.S. Duke saving Ana in the end and the nano tech in her head that brainwashed her to be evil. Come on couldn't she have been just a bad person and work willing for M.A.R.S. Just plain lazy writing. OK another sub plot that sucked. Snake Eyes and his reason for silence. Why does Hollywood insist on changing things when they ain't broke! This gets me so freakin' Pissy. So instead of Snake Eyes being disfigured and a mute during Viet Nam he is taking a vow silence, BLAH! Now I'm not saying it had to be Viet Nam it could of happened in Iraq in 1991 or 2003 or what ever. It would have stayed true to the source material. There should have been some kind of emotion shown between him and Scarlet as well. Not the half flirting attempts between Ripcord and Scarlet. These changes should have never been made and Larry Hama should have walked of the project because of the changes


I understand up dating a franchise but is it necessary to change the characters origins or just the character in general. Would you change Superman's origin? How about instead of Krypton exploding he is an escaped prisoner and he sees the error of his ways and becomes the protector of Earth. Look at Iron man. The movie changed a few things but they were minor and it stayed true to the source material. There is a reason why ARH has lasted over 25 years, because the back stories and it's characters. As much as I disliked somethings about the story I do have to say I liked this movie better than Transformers or Revenge of the Fallen. Even though I may disagree with what they did with the characters, they actually developed the characters.

These guys are too much! I agree the movie was crap but they are going overboard with the over analyzing. Also, that guy on the right is nuts if he thinks the special effects in ROTF were half as bad as GI Joe.

HATERS ALL!!!!! Plain and simple

I liked the movie. It made up for Revenge Of The Fallen. Sure the movie had it's flaws, but as one poster said, you just have to have an open mind. The chase scene and the Snake/Storm Shadow fights were awesome. Marlon didn't bother me that much as he wasn't that much of a Jar Jar Binks kind of character. I hate the fact that it seemed that everybody wanted to hate this movie and predict the worse. It's bad enough movie critcs wanna be partial when it comes to certain flicks. Not every movie has to be Lord Of The Rings, Brokeback Mountain or any Pixar flick especially since I don't like those kinds of movies. I think it's stupid people go as far as to complain about the Joe's costumes or Storm Shadow carrying a gun. Sheessh. It's really no different than anything Marvel puts out since half of those movies were pretty bad. Since you all predicted that GI Joe was gonna be bad, I predict that Iron Man 2 is gonna blow major chunks, but that's just my opinion just as you all have yours. That's my conclusion.

Skullboy what is a hater?

And I'm sorry, "have an open mind"??..for what exactly?

I will give you that Lee, DBE was worse then Joe..just! Are you writing a review? Just tell us what you thought! You were obviously disappointed or you would be on here saying how much it was better than Cockerine whoreigins!