I want to start off by saying by the way
And yes.....it is me. Bale has dissipated along with Bateman. Now it just....Spacey.
As the summer rolls on by as we near the end of big summer blockbusters. We really can't predict Dawn of The Planet Apes, since we are near release, what we can do though is predict movies ahead of schedule. I'm talking of course
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES
Releasing August 8th a week after Guardians of The Galaxy, its time to go over some of my predictions for what the future holds for us as moviegoers, critics, assholes, dirtbags, bitches, sluts, HOOKERS, and of course....all of the above. So let us carry on. Don't exit yet, I'm only getting started.
Story is now the biggest part of blockbusters in todays age. Without a good script, you get a bunch of raving lunatic fanboys going online and raging about the certain moment you do not like or exact story. What is important to know about this story is predicting what moment will this have a message for us, the answer is....NONE. As for story though, we can expect this to be a plot-driven movie. Now before all you detractors go bonkers, a plot-driven movie isn't always good as somethings the movie could be so high on the plot that it might just fall asleep like your average pothead watching his favorite Saturday night porn, I digress. The story, will probably have a connection with April & the Turtles and more importantly the new character to enter TMNT mythology, Ed Sachs. As for his turn in the movie, it is obvious he is the villain of the movie along with Shredder. April is an investigating reporter down on her luck. She loses her job, nobody takes her seriously as a journalist or even a reporter and is most likely laughed at. She will most likely have a moment in her past that reflects this very moment where she might need this certain character or might admire this certain character who might be the focal point down the road in the movie.
As her night goes, THE FOOT CLAN, is at a subway doing god knows what, where we are greeted to our main 4 heroes in an all out battle with them. April, decides to follow them through the battle to a rooftop, where she tries to take photos of this, because of course, what do journalists do or reporters, THEY REPORT! As such as being greeted to them, she probably faints and is taken back to the Turtle lair where she greets Splinter and is introduced to who they are, name by name in a cheesy manner or probably comedic manner that might make you smile....or frown....whatever floats your emotion during the showing. As for Sachs being the focal point, he is probably responsible for the murder or shall I say "CONNECTION" with the the Turtles and April. As April reports back, she tells our supporting cast about the Turtles. As for Sachs who finds out about the Turtles or hunts them because he is probably paying The Foot Clan or supplying them with weapons, our main villain supposably Oroku Saki will most likely be a HENCHMAN, that is right folks, a henchman. A henchman who is given the Shredder armor to attack the Turtles whereabouts and destroy them or bring them to the Foot Clan, in the process they end up severly injuring Splinter, or most likely DEATH. It is then when the Turtles are captured by the Foot Clan and taken to Sachs, where the secret diabolical plan from Sachs is to unleash something deadly.
April, being the good ol' reporter that she is, tracks down the Turtles only to find Splinter in his last words dying. It is then she tracks down Sachs, lets the turtles loose, and ensues our climatic battle with the Foot Clan and with Oroku Saki and April stopping Sachs. As for the ending on what type of message we will be seeing, this might be a message about the importance of family. No matter what happens in family, we stick through together no matter what upsets or throws us off.
As for the Turtles being in the snowy mountains and what not, my guess is flashbacks of some sort.
PREDICTING: THE CHARACTERS
As for the characters, the characters will most likely be cheesy and probably more for children. We are looking at a movie about Turtles now who have ninja abilities (despite their giant sized shape) and since the show is at an all time high with children of young ages. The characters will have dilemmas that will probably have the usual typical shit that you see.
Losing a job
Big climatic battle that puts everything together
Pretty much in a nutshell what big blockbusters, but not all, typically tend to do with characters they really have no interest in adding sort of layers to make them more interesting. We will most likely, get the Turtles we all know and love, and they happen to fit perfectly as a movie team. The brave, and courageous leader, the rebel anti-hero, the smart strategic scientist, and the dopey loveable idiot (comedic side to the heroes) and of course let us not forget the human characters to which they happen to be all some sort of comedians in the past, well at least on the good side. Like Will Arnett & Whoopi Goldberg. As I don't expect much and neither should you from those two, I feel they will add only levitation for Aprils progression and nothing more but sequels. Oh and of course, COMEDY.
PREDICTING: LOVE OR HATE IT?
As for the outcome, it really is a ballpark when it comes to the exact outcome of how the movie will unfold on audiences, and most likely the audiences who watch this will not be newcomers but will most likely (the majority) will be Ninja Turtle fans. If you are a fan, there is a huge chance that there is a direction that you would like for the TMNT characters to go, that you would feel morally obligated to voice an opinion on and state where they should go. Not talking about the acting, but the story and characters, primarily which is why I have only two predictions to begin with. It is a movie like this that might ruffle some jammies and jimmies, but might ruffle them in a good way?
From the beginning, this movie had no hope. From alien blue door scripts, to rumors of a new Shredder being white and now that we are finally itching closer to the movies release, one is to wonder how optimistic you want to go with the movie. That is where it leaves you entirely to figure out on your own on whether or not this will be an intriguing movie or possibly a fun action romp for fans to enjoy, which honestly, IT LOOKS TO BE JUST THAT. Of course this isn't the animatronic age where animatronics were used for the Turtles, and even though the looks do seem out there, for some reason, the previews are beginning to capture the spirit of the Turtles more then we actually know.
Transformers movies for example, of course can be better, along with GI Joe, but then again, these are toy movies where toys themselves for some reason by fans are beginning to be taken seriously. As they move to TV and then to comics, the seriousness elevates within our minds to think these characters deserve the proper treatment from big Hollywood writers that actually know what RESPECTING the source material actually is. Whether or not it does they still seem to follow the spirit of what made them famous to begin with and that was that they were entertaining and fun. Fun meaning you could transform a robot into a Ford Mustang, or have a bunch of soldiers up against super villain terrorist group all in your bedroom. Which is what many kids who had grown up past these stages developed with their sane minds to do. The turtles, fall into this category.
Of course they have a different background then the other toys that developed into cartoon shows, but to be honest would you take them serious as a Nolan movie would take a man dressed in a bat-suit with a horrible past, or would you take the fun route with the characters? So I strongly believe with the tone, characters and humor with this movie is that it will be well recieved in general, what won't be well recieved is most likely the handling of certain characters (Shredder, April) or story itself which seems to always be the focal reasoning for fans to determine whether a movie is good or not.
PREDICTING: BOX OFFICE
As for the box office of the movie. I predict it will overthrow Guardians of The Galaxy for the number 1 spot for the weekend and most likely take the number 1 spot again for the second weekend. Not saying Guardians will fail at the box office, but what they are going up against is a juggernaut franchise that has had its in and outs with the crowds since the 80's, where as Guardians is a movie that is centered on using Marvel Studios label, as a means for people to give a chance and hopefully build upon that.
Most likely opening weekend TMNT will make 50-70 million opening weekend, anything below will be a smack in the face, and obviously would need a tremendous amount of word of mouth to follow through. Given that it will be up against three movies such as Let's Be Cops, which looks to be a huge comedy with general audiences, Expendables 3, a sequel with a PG-13 rating which means more asses in the seats, and The Giver with Jeff Bridges which by the looks of it has no intention of making it as good as the book is even with Bridges as The Giver due to marketing the movie as a Twilight/Hunger Games esque movie for teens (big fail!) Other then that, I suspect a healthy box office draw for TMNT that will ensure probable sequels in the future. Maybe 400-600 million worldwide, which by my calculations, would surpass the first three Turtle movies.
THANK YOU FOR READING. BY ALL MEANS PLEASE GIVE ME YOUR OPINIONS IN THE COMMENT SECTION BELOW ALONG WITH THE BIG RED THUMB TO GO ABOUT IT.
NEXT UP ON PREDICTIONAIRE!!!!!