5 Things Common In Every Spider-Man Movie.

The 5 things to look forward to(or not) in your kid friendly neighborhood Spiderman film.

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By rohan - 6/27/2014
  • Save the girl!

                       This one didn't turn out too well
At this point, I just hope Peter stops dating altogether, because I don’t think I can sit through another film that involves the same shtick. It just seems like the writers couldn’t be bothered to give the villains  or the leading ladies any other motivation (besides Doctor Octopus, to be fair. Spiderman 2 remains the golden standard for the franchise), so they keep recycling the script from Raimi’s first film.

You’d think someone would suspect why the same girls keep finding themselves in these situations constantly.

To recap, MJ was practically thrown from the sky by Green Goblin, captured by Doc Ock, and then left in a web next to a construction site by Venom and Sandman. Is that seriously not enough to raise a few questions about the guy she’s dating/ been dating? Let not even get started on Gwen’s luck.

At 5 movies in, spidey has an 80% success rate, which let’s be honest, is pretty good. Here’s hoping the planned Sinister Six movie doesn’t come down to the team having to save their girlfriends from each other.


 

  • They might as well be produced by Marvel.

                                    
No one seems interested in exposing Spiderman’s identity. Being the only Major Marvel superhero out there actually battling a dual identity crisis, one would think someone may just want to expose him. Be it Norman, Harry, Harry’s butler (what was up with that scene?!) or Eddie Brock/ Venom from Raimi’s trilogy, or Harry again, or Dr, Conners/ lizard from the rebooted series.


 

  • F**k the Po-lice

          
A lot of superhero movies tend to portray the authorities as almost utterly incompetent, but the lengths to which this franchise has taken it is almost offensive. The only purpose the NYPD appears to serve in a Spiderman movie is to let the audience know how strong the villain(s) really is (are). There was a scene in ‘The Amazing Spiderman’ where cops actually take lizard down in a shootout towards the end of the film, which I really liked in principle, but he just regenerated in a second and converted all the cops in the frame into lizards. I guess I should have known better.

A special mention goes out to the trigger happy cop who decides to take a shot at Electro while Spiderman is trying to get through to him. He singlehandedly managed to release a shit storm on New York, and so is indirectly accountable for making the audience sit through the drab second half of The Amazing Spiderman 2


 

  • Believe in co-incidence
           
Both origin movies conveniently have a super hero and super villain spawning in the same city, at about the same time, and they just happen to know each other! At other times you have an alien symbiote from OUTER SPACE coming in an attaching itself to the ONLY superhero around. It proves alien life exists, but no biggie. Peter would rather prance around in a suspicious black spidey suit with no idea of its origins

Mark Webb’s movies are no better in this department: The guys who’s kid Spiderman saves in ‘The Amazing Spiderman’ just happens to be an ON DUTY crane operator with a ton of clout, IN the vicinity of the action, AND has no problem lining up some cranes to help our neighborhood arachnid on his way.

More recently, Electro and Harry decide to work against Spiderman together, but Harry decides to wait till Spiderman is finished with Electro before conveniently showing up to a fair fight. What a benevolent bad guy.



  • Expect he expected
       

The reason I say this is because each one of these movies has been fundamentally vanilla. Spiderman is going to beat the bad guys and save the city yet again. Its pretty much exactly how it plays out every time. Hell, even Transformers killed Optimus Prime for a bit in Revenge of the Fallen.

Besides that one sub-plot in Raimi’s ‘Spider-Man’ where Green Goblin tries to convince Spiderman to work with him, I can’t really think of a subplot that really excited me in terms of the character arc within any of the films.

The whole Peter losing focus and his powers arc in Spiderman 2 was one of the worst subplots in a superhero movie, and no surprise: the minute MJ is captured by the villain all the focus comes swinging back in a second.

The symbiote, and consequently Venom’s entire arc was wasted in Spiderman 3, not to mention (again) Gwen Stacy there.

A lot of views seemed to find the Richard Parker sub plot interesting in the new series, but I’ll wait to call it till I see it get fully developed hopefully in the third film.

Rhino, Norman Osbourne were most recently wasted in Amazing Spiderman 2, serving almost no purpose whatsoever
 




     
How cool would this be?

I’m sure I’m not the only one who wants to see the likes on Kraven, Carnage, and yes, Venom too done right.
Sure, I'm not expecting a full blown Carnage arc, or the Six Arm Saga to show up on screen anytime soon, but how cool is just the thought of those stories being adapted. Here's hoping that maybe SONY is listening, and turns things around with their next few offerings.
 

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GizmoEl - 6/27/2014, 3:36 PM
To be fair, Gwen never seemed like the damsel in distress type. She seemed like the "I know it's dangerous but I have to help" type. MJ was used as bait in the first trilogy whereas Gwen synthesized the cure in the first movie and helped take down Electro in the second one.. before dying a pretty brutal death. I wish she stuck around for another movie.

The police were also a lot less anti-Spidey in the second TASM movie. At the end a reporter even said that the NYPD admitted that they needed Spidey to come back.

Coincidences are found in most movies, and it's pretty lame.

In terms of expect the unexpected, I agree but that also applies to most superhero movies nowadays. At least this one killed the leading lady in it's latest installment and will keep her dead.
HOTSHOT - 6/27/2014, 3:39 PM
Cool article. Howevver,the whole coincidence thing? Two words: Parker Luck.

Also:"The whole Peter losing focus and his powers arc in Spiderman 2 was one of the worst subplots in a superhero movie," Agree to disagree.
CorndogBurglar - 6/27/2014, 3:40 PM
1. Peter Parker

2. Aunt May

3. Webs

4. A red and blue costume

5. Love interest.

Article over.
3DOldskool - 6/27/2014, 3:55 PM
"The whole Peter losing focus and his powers arc in Spiderman 2 was one of the worst subplots in a superhero movie."

Go pick up a Spider-man comic book called Amazing Spider-man No. 50 and you will know why that statement has zero credibility to be called on.
CookieKid247 - 6/27/2014, 4:16 PM
Despite being a bad movie, I loved the scene in ASM2 when Spidey had on a fireman's hat and was putting out the flames too.

MexicanChinman - 6/27/2014, 4:31 PM
1. Almost every superhero film has the the hero save the love interest or a woman they care about. Gwen Stacey didn't even get captured by the villain in TASM.
2. So what? Doc Ock, Sandman, and The Lizard don't want to kill Spiderman, they just don't want Spiderman to stop their plans but they don't care exposing him. The other just want to kill him themselves and they don't want others to do for them.
3. The police were barely in the originals. The only reason the police wanted Spiderman in the first film is because of the Daily Bugle. I liked the way the police was used in TASM, like in Batman Begins, and made sense to way the police wanted him.
4. Every single film has coincidences in them. Just accept that or don't watch movies ever again.
5. Superhero films and other action films always beats the villains and saves the day.
3DOldskool - 6/27/2014, 4:36 PM
"Almost every superhero film has the the hero save the love interest or a woman they care about. Gwen Stacey didn't even get captured by the villain in TASM."

Nice to know, but she did get captured and died in TASM 2. Once again, the MJ from the original trilogy was just horrible writing.

"The police were barely in the originals"

There were policemen everywhere in Spider-man 1, 2 and 3. They were more concerned with the villains' threat than Spider-man being a vigilante.

Other than those, I agree with you.
HypeMusheen - 6/27/2014, 4:39 PM
I love how when the Rhino is shooting at cops, and there's a big crowd of people behind a barricade just watching instead of running away. then this kid crawls underneath and goes out into the line of fire, his mom starts screaming at him.

so how do New York's finest respond? let's say Cop A responds first and tries to restrain the mother, while Cop B responds a second later and slowly chases after the kid but for some reason gives up trying to save the kids life.. because he's afraid of being shot at? maybe Cop A didn't see the kid, but then why didd he restrain a woman screaming someone's name in a particular direction and not think to look that way? why couldn't Cop B outrun a small child? bad screenwriting, but kind of forgivable in a way.

the crowd was watching the spectacle because they're tough New Yorkers in a city with the only superhero action ever. the NYPD are incompetent in the Spider-Man universe because real-life cops are generally seen as incompetent, power-tripping fools. also, you're article forgot to mention how many funeral scenes are featured in every single movie except Spider-Man 2.
CookieKid247 - 6/27/2014, 4:53 PM
You forgot crying in your article but Andrew Garfield oesn't cry nearly as much as Tobey Maguire so...