EDITORIAL: Does Ben Affleck Measure Up To Other BATMAN Actors?

Is Ben Affleck ("Gigli") the Batman fanboys deserve, or even need right now? Time to see if Ben Affleck ("Gigli") measures up to previous actors that squeezed into the Batman costume.

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By nailbiter111 - 4/27/2014
Ever since Warner Bros. announced, Ben Affleck ("Gigli") was playing Batman in Zack Snyder's Man of Steel sequel, fanboys have been concerned that the actor is not right for the part. Yeah sure, Affleck's trainer has proclaimed in recent tweets that the Argo actor will end up being the "biggest, leanest" Batman ever, and Jennifer Garner, Affleck's wife, has boasted, her husband currently sports 17-inch biceps, but what about his gluteus maximus? Let's look at recent photos of Ben pumping gas.
Take a good hard look at those images above and answer me this, is that a Batman ass? Will that ass be faithful to the comic book interpretations? I'm not so sure, and neither is Affleck. Multiple sources have confirmed to me that Affleck has resorted to lewd tactics, like showing excessive butt cleavage to divert our eyes from his inferior rear end. I've heard that he feels as though he'll never live up to previous Batman rumps like the ones Val Kilmer and George Clooney showcased in Joel Schumacher's much beloved films, Batman Forever (1995) and Batman & Robin (1997). Those films have been praised for Shumacher's strict adherence to source material. Many attribute those accolades to Schumacher's eagle-eye for casting actors that could pull off Batman's chiseled derriere. Which you can enjoy in the two epic video clips below.
Executives are so concerned about pleasing fans that sources have told me they instructed Chuck Lorre to peek at Ben Affleck's nether region while they were both using the urinals at the 25th Annual Producers Guild of America Awards. That inspection led Lorre to tell the audience, "Yes I peeked. And yes, Comic-Con, he can play Batman." That news pleased most fanboys, but it means Ben has ample junk, just not in his trunk. At press time, Lorre was unavailable for comment due to his commitment to a party being held at Bryan Singer's house.
at the 25th Annual Producers Guild of America Awards
Read more at http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/nailbiter111/news/?a=93263#UkdIj60mGMmdCccx.99
at the 25th Annual Producers Guild of America Awards
Read more at http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/nailbiter111/news/?a=93263#UkdIj60mGMmdCccx.99
at the 25th Annual Producers Guild of America Awards
Read more at http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/nailbiter111/news/?a=93263#UkdIj60mGMmdCccx.99
at the 25th Annual Producers Guild of America Awards
Read more at http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/nailbiter111/news/?a=93263#UkdIj60mGMmdCccx.99

The logical comparison should fall upon the last Batman, Christian Bale. That's hard to do since Christopher Nolan never shot the actor from the waist down. Why? Well, before Bale starred in Batman Begins he lost 60 pounds for his role in The Machinist. Living off of a diet consisting of only black coffee, an apple and a can of tuna each day. Once he had to start packing on the pounds/muscles for Bruce Wayne/Batman, Bale stuffed his face with 32 slices of pizza a day and drank melted cartons of Häagen Dazs ice cream every moment that he was thirsty. His bizarre high-carb diet left him with what doctors call, a lumpy butt. Nolan originally didn't want his version of Batman to wear a cape, but after seeing Bale's lumpy butt he needed to add the cape in order to hide it.

Bale isn't the only Batman actor that shied away from showing what was below his Bat-belt. Michael Keaton who starred in Batman and Batman Returns was uncomfortable about showing his backside. Insiders have told me this was because Tim Burton wanted to smear gobs of white makeup on keaton's tush. Even Adam West, who portrayed Batman in the classic 1960's television series was reticent about his lower-half. Though, in his case it had more to do with what was in the front and less to do with his cheeks. Doesn't take the World's Greatest Detective to know he was hung more like a boy wonder than a Bat-MAN.
And don't think Warner Bros. isn't listening to the concerns of fans. I'm told by multiple sources that studio executives have been monitoring message boards as they are very sensitive to fan sentiment, and are even relying on fan-casts as inspiration for future casting decisions.

Hopefully by the time cameras start rolling Ben will have buns so plump Oscar Mayer will be drooling.

BATMAN/SUPERMAN - Zack Snyder will direct the film from a screenplay being written by Chris Terrio from a screenplay by David S. Goyer and a story co-created by Goyer and Snyder. Zack Snyder’s Superman/Batman film stars Henry Cavill, reprising his role as Superman/Clark Kent, and Ben Affleck as Batman/Bruce Wayne. The film will also reunite “Man of Steel” stars Amy Adams as Lois Lane, Laurence Fishburne as Perry White, Diane Lane as Ma Kent, Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor, Ray Fisher as Cyborg and Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman/Diana Prince. Zack Snyder’s untitled Superman/Batman film which will now be arriving in theaters May 6, 2016.
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103 Comments
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LEEE777 - 4/27/2014, 1:24 PM
NO!

'cept CLOONEY and KILMER movie-wise. :p

KEATON & BALE are unbeatable.

;)
BatManHeisenberg - 4/27/2014, 1:26 PM
WHAT THE [frick]! THIS IS FUNNY!
DrunkenNukem - 4/27/2014, 1:28 PM
LMFAO...and to think i call myself "drunken"...
LEEE777 - 4/27/2014, 1:29 PM
Lol, yeah big thumbs up! ; D

MrBatmor - 4/27/2014, 1:42 PM
holy shit!! THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO DECIDE ACTORS!!! NAIL JUST WON...:p
InfiniteMonkey - 4/27/2014, 1:56 PM
Butt crack Ewwwww.

Ben Affleck will be fine.

I'm looking forward to this but in the meantime;
Scorpion8125 - 4/27/2014, 2:01 PM


NO!!!

BubSnikt - 4/27/2014, 2:02 PM
LMAO
Emjeed - 4/27/2014, 2:03 PM
Nail.. You're [frick]ing awesome!
DrunkenNukem - 4/27/2014, 2:05 PM
IndependentGeorge - 4/27/2014, 2:07 PM
"EDITORIAL: Does Ben Affleck Measure Up To Other BATMAN Actors?"


Inhuman - 4/27/2014, 2:07 PM
Im telling you, because Affleck got so much crap from all you ppl, he's gonna be the best Batman watch. Life is funny like that lol
Arrow96 - 4/27/2014, 2:07 PM
At press time, Lorre was unavailable for comment due to his commitment at a party at Bryan Singer's house.
I'M DYING
SwanRonson - 4/27/2014, 2:09 PM
He'll be great. Just watch.
0megaDaGod - 4/27/2014, 2:09 PM
Your Jackie impression is flawless

0megaDaGod - 4/27/2014, 2:09 PM
@Nailbiter

Have you gotten any new scoops from your WB source recently?
rebellion - 4/27/2014, 2:12 PM
and this is why this site will never be as credible as others.
ManCalledSting - 4/27/2014, 2:13 PM
Well that was pretty lame, pretty lame indeed.
ABH1979 - 4/27/2014, 2:13 PM
I wanted Fassbender to be Batman, and that would have solved all of the above concerns.
Nomis - 4/27/2014, 2:15 PM
LLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL !!!!!!!!!!

Nail, this might be your must thought provoking article ever! :)
coganoid - 4/27/2014, 2:15 PM
This is the nonsense you bother not only publishing but promoting? So even if you have some great articles moving forward can we say Nailbiter ("Affleck ass article") has....
ManCalledSting - 4/27/2014, 2:16 PM
Batfleck will own.
nailbiter111 - 4/27/2014, 2:18 PM
0megaDaGod - no, that source is not reliable now.
Prime - 4/27/2014, 2:21 PM
Ben Affleck won't be the problem here...it will be Goyer and Snyder. Affleck at least has proven to be a competent director.
0megaDaGod - 4/27/2014, 2:22 PM
@Nailbiter

If you don't mind me asking, what happened? And does that mean his previous scoops lost credibility? I completely understand if you can't answer that
bobevanz - 4/27/2014, 2:24 PM
Where the hell am I?
nailbiter111 - 4/27/2014, 2:27 PM
0megaDaGod - I can't go into any detail. All I can say, at this time that person's info can't be relied upon.
BigBossKaz - 4/27/2014, 2:35 PM
He is no Clooney but he'll do
diagnostic - 4/27/2014, 2:36 PM
Hype.
thebearjew - 4/27/2014, 2:36 PM
ben afflecks a great actor get over it mate
using giggle over and over again as reference of his acting abilities is kind of funny but I think you just wanted to post emberassing photos of him so I shall do the same



MrDonut - 4/27/2014, 2:36 PM
My lord... It's been a while since I laughed this hard from checking this site... Brilliant article. Thank you, I needed this shit today lol.
Zuriel - 4/27/2014, 2:37 PM
So are we or are not going to see Afleck's Batman and Cavill's Superman fight each other with their asses?
DudleyDawson - 4/27/2014, 2:39 PM
I once read an article about a guy who used to take baths with his pets..i thought that was the nuttiest thing id read until this article...Affleck will kill it...annnnd everyone wil say..."I wanted him all along"
DrAtom - 4/27/2014, 2:39 PM
Ben Afflech gonna do great I love this casting choice.
MantiniumBorn - 4/27/2014, 2:39 PM
He will be legendary think SUPERMAN/RORSCHACH/ZOD/DRMANHATTAN/FAORA/COMEDIAN and Batfleck by SNYDER,an oscar winner,dressed as the Bat,it will be legendary,I can smell it...
ipookorn - 4/27/2014, 2:41 PM
Not one to rip articles but why no tale of the tape comparing height/weight. Isn't afflict 6'4"? He has to be the tallest to play the role.
Pasto - 4/27/2014, 2:43 PM
Bropous is gonna love this. He's always talking about Ben Affleck's ass anyways.
DudleyDawson - 4/27/2014, 2:46 PM
and not just Affleck..........ALL of Lord Snyders picks have been amazing....when i saw Gal Gadot the fist time..i said i have NO CLUE who that is but she better be Wonder Wonder..and she is...thank you Lord Snyder for chosing the exotic gorgeous incredibly athletic Gadot over the various giant breasted she -hulks these fanboys are crying about....perfection oh and thanks for Jesse Esienberg ..thankfully i dont have to watch another Gene Hackman impersonation.. i got something original....blesS you Lord Snyder..only problem is probably not the blue Batsuit
DudleyDawson - 4/27/2014, 2:48 PM
booooo hooooo i wanted this person i wanted that person....get out og your house and make a movie ....and cast whoever you want.problem solved
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