X-Men Continuity Problems? Time To Set The Record Straight...
Come one, come all! Bring your X-Men continuity issues with you. And get ready to kiss them all goodbye. No problem too big, no problem too small. That's right, we are answering every and all continuity issues, one way or another... starting right now!
Now that Bryan Singer's latest epic entry in Fox's X-Men franchise is almost upon us, we can feel the hot sickly sweet breath of Days of Future Past slapping lightly upon our necks and feel it coiled up like a maniac cobra ready to pounce upon us and deliver it's death blow poison strike.
I say bring it on, only god can judge me. But I am seeing lots of clamoring and controversial issues being raised in the Continuity Department. Although lots of people say Mr. Singer and crew will somehow make these continuity problems obsolete by changing the timelines, I say that's not Bryan Singer's job. His job is simply to deliver a great X-Men movie, and that continuity between movies is out of his hands.
This is our responsibility.
One of the saner articles regarding these so called "worries" and "problems" was posted recently, here in this very editorial arena, and it was posted by Gunslinger and it is sourced here as we will be examining first the questions raised by him. Here is also a link to his article, even tho i will keep the numbering of his problems intact, there is much in the comments of that article which might prove informative also, http://www.comicbookmovie.com/fansites/Gunslinger/news/?a=93720.
And thank you Gunslinger, for bringing this topic to my attention.
Beyond this, I have no idea what else you people have problems with. If anyone is left with a problem, it's up to you to ask it here or make another article. But we will answer it for you, that much I guarantee with a happy heart. There's never a question that I've ever heard in my entire life that cannot be answered thru old fashioned good old common sense, wisdom and able imagination.
So here... let us start in this business of clearing up previously Untold Mysteries of the Fox X-Men world....starting right now!
1 - Who built Cerebro? In X1 and X2 it's stated Xavier built it with the help of Magneto but in First Class, Hank (Beast) builds it.
Answer: Cerebro is a strange machine. Hank built it as we even saw with our own eyes. Prof X thru meddling with it was driven to a state of delusion and hatred. This explains it. This is clear thru many hints in the X-Men movies that Cerebro turned Charles into a strange person. Whoever wears it, it's almost like the ring that Gollem owned. it will warp you. Cerebro also holds the answer to many of your so called weird, little "problems". Keep reading and you will be illuminated, once and for all. Don't blame me for what you find when you seek the truth, it's not my job to make you happy. It is merely my job to reveal answers.
2 - In X1, Xavier tells Wolverine both Jean Grey (Phoenix) and Scott Summers (Cyclops) were among his first students. In First Class there was no sign of them.
Answer: This is an easy one. See, he clearly meant Scott and Jean were among his first students, WHO HE DIDN'T MURDER AND EAT. But obviously, didn't feel comfortable with how weird that might have sounded.
3 - We have two completely different incarnations of Sabretooth? The deaf/mute minddless brute in X1, and Wolverine's more eloquent BROTHER in Wolverine Origins. What happened? Are we supposed to believe these two are the same character?
Answer: I have to admit this was a mystery for quite a while. Everyone thought maybe he had undergone some kind of secondary more savage mutation, or that maybe it was just the 80's. But no, definitive proof has arrived that we were all wrong and the answer might be more puzzling than the mystery itself. You see, it turns out Sabertooth was singing in an American rock band called "Metallica". Look, see for yourself...
(still photo of Sabertooth from X-Men:The Movie)
(headshot from "Metallica"'s promo pack)
So chalk one up as another casualty to the dangerous path of sex, drugs and rock n roll. Pretty sad story if you ask me.
4 - Mystique as portrayed in First Class is quite close to Xavier. Actually, that's an understatement. She's his sister in everything but blood. They grew up together from early childhood (7-9?) and you could see throughout First Class they were very close. Even if she becomes a mutant extremist, even if she prefers Magneto's approach to the future of mutants, in X1 she tries to kill Xavier by tampering with Cerebro with absolutely no hesitation. Magneto himself who doesn't share as profound a connection with Xavier seems to be saddened by their disagreements and actually defends Xavier's contributions to the mutant cause. Mystique? She shows no emotion. No connection was acknowledged in the original movies. Doesn't it seem a bit weird? Just a little?
Answer: You guys in Gunslinger's article comments came pretty close to figuring this one out. Close but no cigar. Behold the unseemly truth of the situation...
It was indeed a falling out between the two. And as far as I know, also the true reason that Charles wears a bald wig. Mystique had developed a strange obsession with Charles' hair and she began feeling compelled to lick it on his head all the time. This made Charles very very mad and he hated how it was sticky and gross afterwards and he'd have to go wash it again, and comb it. He's a terribly vain man and it bothered him intensely. Well Mystique one day swore never to lick his hair again. And all was happy for years. Even to the end of First Class, when she leaves with Magneto. Well she would still sneak back and have tea and play outdoor cricket with Charles and the gang. All Until one day, in a violent fit of coughing, out there on the cricket lawn, she coughed up a big huge hairball, of Charles' hair. And Charles saw, and realized she had been sneaking in and licking his hair while he was asleep. And it was so much hair, he had thought his hair was thinning even, but apparently it was just his wretched no good sister figure...Mystique.
So that was pretty much that between the two of them. They never spoke again. Not until much later… But that moment on the cricket lawn, that's when Charles began compulsively wearing the bald wig that you probably thought meant he was bald.
Listen to me…,look Charles is not bald.
He's just scared Mystique will make him bald if he ever takes it off for too long.
So it's that and plus… Mystique also, she doesn't recognize him becuz he started wearing the bald wig.
See, here's something weird about Mystique… she doesn't know what people look like by their faces. no… She goes by people's hair. So how was she to recognize this bald person in a wheelchair? She had no idea, that is the tragedy of it.
5 - In X1, Xavier tells Wolverine he met Magneto when he was 17. In First Class they are in their mid 20s? I assume they are because they look older than 17, and Oxford University graduate Xavier is publishing his thesis on mutation. And drinking pints at the pub.
8 - Let's assume at the end of X3, Xavier transferred his consciousness to his identical twin brother in a coma (codenamed Deus Ex Machina - aka copout). In DOFP he's in a wheelchair again?
11 - In X1 both Xavier and Magneto had no idea who Wolverine was. But in First Class they try to recruit him....
Answer: All of these, in fact most continuity issues can be answered by the same unfortunate truth...
Charles is a liar.
And, no... Charles is not senile, as I saw you guys speculating. In fact far from from it. He's a diagnosed Class 8 sociopath and a compulsive liar. You'd almost say that he can't help it, except for how much he obviously enjoys it and uses it to manipulate and screw everyone else over and get what he wants from them.
And the whole "wheelchair", "Oh poor me, I'm bald and crippled, Look at me!" thing. He's been pulling that for pretty much his whole life... He'll do it to hustle a little scratch, maybe cop some blow, get some tail, whatever's clever, I guess. Just basic short con rackets.
Cerebro really took it's toll on Charles.
This is one of the ways that Singer's X-Men actually does a good translation of the comic book. I can't remember a single comic book where Charles wasn't barking angrily at someone or just plain thinking bad things and trying to make all the kids hate each other. or force them to fall in love with each other. He's a bad person, he always has been.
6 - Moira MacTaggert in X3 was a geneticistic and mutant biologist. In First Class she was an FBI agent? Not to mention the time gap... let's say she was 20 in First Class (being generous for argument's sake). X1 was out in 2000.... that would make her an extremely yummy and well preserved 60 year old...
Answer: Moira is a leprechaun. She's only interested in gold, as gold is the only way to feed her thirst for eternal life. So case closed on that one.
7 - In X2, Beast shows up on TV, and it's clear he hasn't gone through his secondary mutation (blue fur). However, in FC he underwent a secondary mutation? We're talking about 30 years at least before X2. And please, don't tell me it's an Image Inducer. That may exist in the comics, but in X3 when Leech temporarily deactivates Beast's mutation he (Beast) chokes up saying it's been a long time since he saw his own skin.
Answer: 7. Well this shouldn't even be on here... this is just how Beast is. Sometimes he's hairy, sometimes he's a cat, sometimes he's a genius, sometimes he's like looks exactly like you or me. Sometimes his feet are big other times not. Sometimes he's named Hank. Sometimes he wants you to call him "Tiny Trill",
other times.. "The Blue Banana",
Beast is a very strange and troubled person. Sometimes we even think he really isn't a mutant at all, and he's just making the whole thing up for attention. And that he was stealing clumps of fur from veterinary clinics and dying them blue and glueing them in patches on his body. Thus the fluctuations in Beast's physical appearance. It's very sad when you think about it, it really is. Most of the other X-Men know, but they care too much for his ego to ever let on about it.
9 - In FC Xavier knew that Sebastian Shaw's helmet (later to become Magneto's) blocked his telepathy. In X1, he had no idea how Magneto was blocking his thoughts.
Answer: Another question that shouldn't even be on this list. If the helmet is blocking his thoughts, it stands to reason that he would have no idea how Magneto was blocking his thoughts. Because his thoughts were being blocked.
This isn't even about continuity, this is just simple logic. It's like saying if I put a blindfold on you, why can't see me putting another blindfold on you? That's what it's like saying when you ask that question.
10 - Kitty Pryde's power is phasing through solid objects. If she phases through anything electrical in nature, she short circuits it. However, in Days of Future Past, her power allows her to phase Wolverine through time? Seriously? Wouldn't it make more sense to create a mutant specifically for that?
Answer: Kitty's a liar. She never told the team what her true powers was because she's not only a liar, but she's also lazy. And she knew they would keep asking her to use it all the time.
So again, not continuity, but I understand your confusion.
Kitty's power of phasing is pretty stupid. But if I had that power, you know what I would do? Whenever I was out in public and I had to pee...
I would phase myself underground and I would pee there. Instead of ever having to use a public restroom. Then when I was done, I would phase back up to the surface and just act like nothing had happened.
12 - In Wolverine Origins you see Emma Frost in diamond form but no apparent telepathic powers. Quite young as well. In First Class, supposedly about 10 years before, Emma Frost is older and telepathic. And for the naysayers, that is Emma Frost in Origins. Her character's name shows in the credits.
Answer: That's a tough one. hmmmm... That's a real toughie. I'd say First Class Emma. Yeah, First Class Emma, I think she's prettier.
Yeah, for sure, final answer, First Class Emma. that's a tough one tho, and hat's off to both of them.
So I hope that puts a lot of these "issues" to rest. Like I said I have no way of knowing what other nonsense some of you might cook up to worry about. But if you have any continuity issues with these films, leave them here, we will be sure to get back to you with the answer on them.
These movies were crafted according to a very solid plan, and if you can't recognize that then maybe it's time to get a new therapist.
Days of Future Past is definitely almost here, I think it's gonna be a fun one. And cheers to all of you....
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