THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 Review

I'm going to shit on this movie. Deal with it.

Review Opinion

By Hulksta - May 02, 2014 09:05 AM EST

Filed Under: The Amazing Spider-Man 2

So I saw The Amazing Spider-Man 2.

Saw being a very loose term. I sat in a theatre, and watched a bunch of crap float across the screen. At the end of it, I literally mumbled "F*** you Avi" and walked out.

END OF REVIEW!

err maybe not.

OK well let's dive into what I liked about this movie and what I didn't like

WHAT I LIKED:

Gwen (to a degree)
It wasn't longer

WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE:

OK well let's start with villains...this movie crams three villains into one movie. You're thinking god dammit Sony didn't you learn from Spider-Man 3!? The answer...

So Max Dillon, AKA Electro. His arc in the movie is such...

"Hey Spidey, what's up G!"
Spidey: "Who are you?"
"AUGH! I'm a villain now"

Seriously? Like for real!? Electro's arc in TASM2 is less complex then my 4 year olds brain, and that's saying a lot! Speaking of which, I wonder if this movie was written by a 4 year old...

Then there's Rhino, which you see at the beginning...and at the end. Is he interesting?

Then there's Goblin, who I had the most hope for, instead they make him look like some junkie and rehash some stupid story over 40 years old that everyone on the face of the earth knew was coming...oh by the way, Gwen dies. Not a spoiler as THIS PLOT EXISTED FOR CLOSE TO 40 YEARS BEFORE THIS MOVIE.

The movie literally dumps a bunch of references to death and consequence throughout the whole film, like what everyone should be saying is..."Hey the blonde is gonna die dude".

On papaer this movie had a chance to succeed, but you can only blame this on mediocre writing, mediocre directing, and huge massive giant tumor in the world of Comic Book Movies...

Oh man this guy really pisses me off...

This movie had potential and it was wasted. They botched the storyline threads they had going between Electro, Harry becoming Goblin, and Gwen/Peter. Had they eliminated Electro and Rhino, I think they MIGHT have had a shot at actually doing the Goblin justice, but instead they simply were worried too much with setting up a universe then they were with making an actual movie. So in the end you get a lot of buzzwords, but no connective tissue. Green Goblin! Rhino! Electro! Death of Gwen! These are all cool but they need something to set it all up and make it work, and this movie has none of that. That's it's ultimate failiure.

Am I excited for the sequel?

Do I care if you think TASM and TASM2 are great because of superficial bullshit like the webslinging and wise cracking?

So how many Uncle Joeys am I giving this? NONE!

That's right...

No Uncle Joeys!

I will however say this...

Andrew Garfield
Marc Webb
Avi Arad

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 Star Dane DeHaan Talks NO WAY HOME Rumors And Whether He'd Return As Green Goblin

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13 Comments

Hulksta - 5/2/2014, 10:15 AM

I dedicate this review in memorial of LEVITIKUZ. May the spirit of TASM hate carry forward without him.

Lozzy - 5/2/2014, 10:38 AM

"a bunch of crap float across the screen."

That's a quote for the blu-ray release right there.

blackandyellow - 5/2/2014, 11:24 AM

You guys remember when Ror's review of Prometheus was quoted for the critics TV commercial? That probably won't happen with this one.

Washed - 5/2/2014, 12:36 PM

This movie sucks ass

Washed - 5/2/2014, 12:37 PM

One thing you didn't mention : They literally put every single second of the action scenes in the trailer !! Every single second..

acecomics12 - 5/2/2014, 3:11 PM

This was amazing haha. Your review was 100X better than the actual flick.

Starfox - 5/2/2014, 5:32 PM

So you liked it then?

Hulksta - 5/2/2014, 9:11 PM

Touche Nomis

Vortigar - 5/5/2014, 3:34 AM

Ok, so I've been reading reviews on this movie for the last half hour.

This is the only one that made me laugh. Love it. Congrats.

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 Review

I'm going to shit on this movie. Deal with it.

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