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ThisFan
ThisFan - 11/6/2009, 10:27 AM
haha great article i agree with all.
Joe6Pack74
Joe6Pack74 - 11/6/2009, 10:35 AM
DOG WELDER, ROFL!
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 10:39 AM
LMAO!!!

Actually cough cough, WHIZZER is part of THE INVADERS!!!

If they did a movie he'd hav'ta be in it! : D

[frick]ING funny sh1t though, lmao man!!
Killian
Killian - 11/6/2009, 10:44 AM
Dog welder would be awesome. Garth Ennis..didn't he do Preacher? Seems right with the likes of Arseface.
selinakyle
selinakyle - 11/6/2009, 10:55 AM
LOL...Arm fall of boy is definitely weird. Whats even weirder is that he uses it as a weapon.
Kyos
Kyos - 11/6/2009, 10:55 AM
Ridiculous article...













...because Dogwelder [frick]ing rules! ;)
SirExcalibur
SirExcalibur - 11/6/2009, 10:55 AM
Lol my friend saw a comic in an antique store...I think it fits in with these ridiculous characters...the comic and character's name...Elongated Man!......Just...WOW AHahahahaha.....I'd stay in my crisis and wait for another super hero rather than be saved by someone who calls himself ELONGATED MAN....seriously lol.....I hear the ladies love him tho:p ahaha
Verdugo
Verdugo - 11/6/2009, 11:07 AM
You could add to the list the pathetic Madcap.
Wadey09
Wadey09 - 11/6/2009, 11:09 AM
hey dont forget about The Spot! y'know.... the villain that spider-man actually fell over he was laughing so hard?
oh and the Candy Man. this dude has guns that shoot candy. guess what? he tried to rob a TOY STORE!!!
needless to say he was taken down by a large group of three year olds.

and my personal favorite:
Disk Jockey! this fella didn't show up in the comics but he had about a ten page run in the novel Spider-man: Secret of the Sinister Six.
i recommend this book just for this scene. Disk Jockey is the only villain i know of that Spidey actually TALKED out of pursuing a life of crime!
selinakyle
selinakyle - 11/6/2009, 11:20 AM
hmm...i can see how the ladies could be a fan of elongated man. :D
selinakyle
selinakyle - 11/6/2009, 11:26 AM
stubby did u ever wail on someone with it?
selinakyle
selinakyle - 11/6/2009, 11:29 AM
@Multi: What? waramess!
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 11:31 AM
I'd buy that for 2 Dollars!! : D
CorndogBurglar
CorndogBurglar - 11/6/2009, 11:35 AM
@ killian

yes, garth ennis also did preacher! he is a god among writers.

@ sirexcalibur

like multi said, elongated man is actually a very important character in the DCU. and actually very well received by fans!

@ LEE

the whizzer wasn't one of the original invaders was he?? i thought they were cap, bucky, toro, human torch, and namor. you could be right though! either way, he sucks!

@ tea

not sure about whizzer thinking that, i DO know that polaris thought she was magneto's daughter for a long time, until they revealed that the mutant powers you're born with aren't hereditary that is. :)

LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 12:05 PM
CORN @ BRB, gotta take a WHIZZ!!! : D
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 12:08 PM
Ahhhhh thats better!!

CorndogBurglar
CorndogBurglar - 11/6/2009, 12:15 PM
@ LEEE

LOLOLOL! seriously, if i had super speed powers, i'm pretty sure i could think of a better name than "The Whizzer". lol
CorndogBurglar
CorndogBurglar - 11/6/2009, 12:22 PM
@ wadey

the spot almost made it into this!!! i'll put him in my next one. these guys are really just the tip of the iceberg. lol
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 12:33 PM
CORN @ Lol!!! You've got a point!! ; D

TEA @ LMFAO!!! Bwahahhahhahhahhahhahhahaha!!!!
JohnnyKrypton
JohnnyKrypton - 11/6/2009, 12:51 PM
Oh come on...The Whizzer has a yellow costume? Too perfect.
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 11/6/2009, 12:58 PM


Johnny, ya darn rite there man!!! ; D
SirExcalibur
SirExcalibur - 11/6/2009, 1:03 PM
Ahaha that's awesome, I never heard of Elongated Man till my friend told me about him. But you gotta admit it's a pretty funny name lol.
answer
answer - 11/6/2009, 1:13 PM
@Multi, I'm confused, did I comment on this and it's disappeared?! :/
mgalusick
mgalusick - 11/6/2009, 1:15 PM
STILT MAN IS THE GREATEST FOE EVER CREATED! HE CAN GET TALL! HOW DO YOU BEAT THAT?

Wait no there is one better.

Armless Tiger Man 1 Pictures, Images and Photos
Armless Tiger Man.
JoshWilding
JoshWilding - 11/6/2009, 1:47 PM
Haha, great article! :)

But who doesnt want a Whizzer movie!? ;D
bleedthefreak
bleedthefreak - 11/6/2009, 1:48 PM
only thing that's bull shit is stilt man. the character should have a solo movie and be the villain and every you know what i quit this joke i was gonna keep it going but come on... stilt man!!! seriously how baked were these guys to come up with this crap. i love welding class at my school and comics and dogs but what a stupid [frick]ing idea to come up with dog welder
BubbaDude
BubbaDude - 11/6/2009, 2:01 PM
I remember reading a comic , maybe Daredevil or Spiderman, long ago where they were actually making fun of Stiltman. How he was a stupid criminal and wonderin g how he ever had any success as a criminal.



Yeah plenty of loser characters that we never have to worry about seeing on screen. Remember Dr. Druid?

And the Whizzer was originally in the "All Winners Squad"(stupid name for a super group right there). That was an original Golden Age Timely book. Timely was the old name of the company that eventually became Marvel. Roy Thomas retconned him into the Invaders when he wrote the series in the 70's.
InSpace
InSpace - 11/6/2009, 2:08 PM
What about the chair guy from the Tick.
ReddHotPoker
ReddHotPoker - 11/6/2009, 2:48 PM
Characters we would never want to see in a CBM? you forgot hundreds of the most lame characters ever! Known as the spin-offs! They're LIKE the cool popular characters we all know an love yet infinitely more lame!

-She-Hulk
-Superboy
-Superdog
-Supergirl
-Batgirl
-Spider-Girl
-Spider-Woman
-Spider-Pig
-Abominatrix
-Baroness Blood
the list goes on and on. And let us not forget the lamest spin-off ever created...

Robin
JoshWilding
JoshWilding - 11/6/2009, 2:54 PM
ReddHotPoker: After reading Bendis' recent Spider-Woman comic book, I think she'd actually make for a decent movie!
CorndogBurglar
CorndogBurglar - 11/6/2009, 3:34 PM
@ reddhotpoker

like i said, these are just the tip of the iceberg. i'll be doing at least another one, but in the 60 some years of comic history, you're totally right, there are thousands of horrendously terrible characters out there! lol
CorndogBurglar
CorndogBurglar - 11/6/2009, 3:34 PM
@ inspace

lol, chairface chippendale.
SlaughterHouse
SlaughterHouse - 11/6/2009, 3:37 PM
Come on, who wouldn't want to see a movie where a guy runs around welding dogs to people's face!? lol.

It's amazing how someone actually thought that that was a good idea. Did they think that was going to be the next Magneto?
hewilldefytheirgravity
hewilldefytheirgravity - 11/6/2009, 3:56 PM
I remember Matter-Eater-Lad,Paste-Pot-Pete, and Stiltman. These characters are quite embarassing. I've always enjoyed both Marvel and DC comics but as a kid it always seemed that DC's guys looked to clownish to be taken seriously. Way to many capes. LOL.
EphPhaThaINC
EphPhaThaINC - 11/6/2009, 4:12 PM
I swear...

These all sound like characters from The Tick

(BTW, Tick-greatest Saturday morning cartoon ever bitches.)

Something comes to mind whenever I see Composite Superman. I am immediately brought to mind of a certain Robot Chicken episode.

Gohan: "What's Composite Santa's power dad?"

GoKu: "I don't know, but he freaks me the F(FCCbeep)k out."
shibazz
shibazz - 11/6/2009, 4:25 PM
I am a DC fan first and foremost! BatMan Rules !!! but the Justice league has to have the largest collection of Idiotic wastes of spandex i have ever seen. The Legion of Super Heroes is embarrassing. And i really hate the guy with the white pants that is a CowBoy. so dumb.
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