Spoilers! ROBOCOP Is A Transformer In The Remake!
Drew McWeeny of HitFix has expressed his displeasure with the latest script for the Robocop remake. It includes four different versions of Robocop, with one resembling a Transformer.
It's clear from Drew McWeeny's tweets that he doesn't care for the script of the Robocop remake. He goes as far as saying Len Wiseman's Total Recall seems like a masterpiece compared to Nick Schenk's (Gran Torino) latest revision of Robocop. Here are some of Drew's more informative tweets.
In the film, when Murphy is turned into Robocop 1.0, it's described "a high-tech version of the '80s suit." Then they show a focus group scene where criminals laugh at the design. "He looks like a toy from the '80s!" So they redesign him to look "meaner" as Robocop 2.0, who passes focus group approval. So they not only make sure to include the original design, they also point out it's dated and stupid.
Hold onto your sides for more hilarious "Robocop" details. They outsource his construction to China. #seriously
And we meet the ED-209s in the field in Iran, where they're used to subdue suicide bombers.
Ahhh... now they just dropped Robocop 3.0 onto an Al Queda training camp to see what he does. "He should be programmed to incapacitate in all scenarios." "Agreed. Let's keep him PG-13, Dr. Norton." No. No. No. No.
By page 54, they are already onto Robocop 4.0, who looks like a "cop on steroids painted metallic blue." Oh, god... oh dear god... Robocop is a Transformer. He goes from "social mode" to "combat mode" and back. Full transformation.
It's tough to determine tone on the page, but "satire" seems low on their list of priorities.
Okay... the two "best" lines in the script. First up is at the unveiling ceremony for Robocop in Detroit, from a TV reporter covering it. "I think it's safe to say that Alex Murphy is now part man, part machine, ALL COP!" Yes, I too remember the original poster, asshat.
Second, after the traumatic first meeting with his father, Alex's son retreats to the apartment of Lewis, Murphy's male partner. The scene ends with the action line "David sits, catatonic, looks at the TV -- MGM REMAKE TBD." It means "to be determined." They haven't decided which of their other movies to plug with that clip.
Someone shows Pope, head of the OCP project, some mock-ups for Robocop action figures. "Are you kidding? I wouldn't buy that for a dollar!"
I'll say this: once the script stops all the winky-winky crap and just starts telling a story, it's not terrible. But it's way too late.If you can get past Robocop The Transformer, there are some interesting action beats. And I'm sure Padilha will direct the hell out of it.
Thanks for the heads up from Jasper Cresdee-Hyde
RoboCop will be directed by Jose Padilha and star Joel Kinnaman (The Killing) in the lead role of Alex Murphy/Robocop. The film also stars: Gary Oldman, Hugh Laurie, Samuel L. Jackson, Michael Kenneth Williams, Jennifer Ehle, Jay Baruchel and Abbie Cornish. The remake will be in theaters August 9th, 2013.
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